Star Trek - Triangle

Kirk tried fitfully to stir, alarm bells going off in his head.  It was always a mistake to think of the Vulcan as if he was human.  He was not.  What deadly Vulcanism did Sola and Spck know about, which Kirk did not?  Something which was triggered by what Spock  could not deny  he had felt for Sola?

I've calmed down a little bit, I promise!

... I promise nothing.

I really have neglected reading the earlier novels, so I turned to my partner and said -

"Choose from the following titles - " I listed the titles #3 to #9.

"Triangle?  It has to be Triangle - what kind of a name is Triangle anyway?"

And so I read Triangle (#9 Pocket, #49 Titan)  by Sondra Marshak and Myrna Culbreath.  I didn't hold out much hope for Triangle, I had to concur that it was a very strange name for a Star Trek novel.  However, as it turns out it wasn't something as innocuous as a title I had to be worried about.

As you may or may not know, Sondra Marshak and Myrna Culbreath were the two authors behind the William Shatner autobiography, 'Where no Man', and it isn't unknown that they have certain agendas.  They are also pretty notorious in the slash fandom some even going so far as crediting them for creating slash.  Typically I picked up the last book they penned together, soon after Sondra Marshak appears to have gone MIA - her former friends and writing partners don't appear to know where she is - and Myrna Culbreath went back to education and is credited with a phonics learning program.

-- Ok, maybe I'm not so impressed with that, I was forced to learn to read through a phonics program, and it didn't work for me at all  (I was instead taught to read at home by my mother without the use of phonics).  But it was trendy in the 80s and 90s so I guess I can't hold that against her... maybe. -- 

Sondra Marshak and Myrna Culbreath are intelligent women, and are/were highly influential within the ST fandom.  They are also quite academic and mix their own agendas and themes into the novels, -sometimes fairly hamfistedly, sometimes with a sledgehammer - and are very influenced by the psychological studies of the time.  They were involved in much trouble and controversy, which eventually saw them banned and alienated from conventions and publishers.  They were busy!

Marshak and Culbreath published four Trek novels

- The Price of the Phoenix (1977) - Bantam Books
- The Fate of the Phoenix (1979) - Bantam Books
- The Prometheus Design (1982) - Pocket Books
- Triangle (1983) - Pocket Books

They also have been involved in editing / contributing to two anthologies, while Sondra Marshak individually was involved in Star Trek Lives with Jacqueline Lichtenberg and Joan Winston.

Triangle is a hot, messy hurt/comfort fanfiction, and it's a little uncomfortable to read... ok, it's a lotta uncomfortable to read although it did cause me to laugh and be anxious in equal measure.  You might have gathered by other reviews, I am pretty protective of our illustrious Captain James. T... I don't like misrepresentation of him and I don't like to see him degraded for no reason.  I think Triangle really does cross that line.

I think I should fess up that I'm really not a big fan of hurt/comfort stories, although I do enjoy stories that have some of it in (I can't really deny that), I don't really like it when it's literally the kink  whole point of the story.

Triangle actually started out fairly interesting, and I was quite excited by the promise of a story which picks up the New Humans idea which is first introduced in the Star Trek The Motion Picture novelisation.  Since Marshak and Culbreath seemed to have a lot of contact with Roddenberry (and at the very least, Roddenberry knew of and/or used sections of the Kraith fanfiction), I thought that perhaps they would have more of an idea of where that storyline/idea would be going.  I guess I wasn't totally wrong they did have a really good idea that at times was a bit far fetched but at the same time 'very Trek'.

So essentially we are introduced to one of the New Human groups that essentially want to move towards a group consciousness.  An ambassador from the planet Zaran wants to be taken back to his planet by a representative of Starfleet - in this case their best - with the intention of testing them against his 'Oneness'.  There can only be one choice, Captain James T Kirk.  This seems like a pretty cut and dry mission, but wait!  The Enterprise will also have to pass through an area which is known as a starship trap, the 'Marie-Celeste' sector.  So there is story line number two, Kirk is going to experience the peril of the starship trap.

Seems like a nice set up... but it's pretty much down hill from there.

Understandably, Kirk's trials are taking their toll on him.  Not only is he physically exhausted and injured, but he is also being mentally assaulted by the Zaran ambassador Gailbraith.

Captain James T. Kirk saw the Vulcan's dark head and pointed ears bend over the scanners, and he took advantage of Spock's concentration to move, too carefully, from near the turbo lift doors to the command seat.   

Not that there was much the Vulcan was going to miss about his Captain, or ever had, but the last thing Kirk wanted just now was for Spock to read whatever the hell was going on with his Captain.  Fatigue, that was all.  And a few half-healed injuries - ribs cracked and the like.  He'd been banged up a little too much lately.  And not getting much sleep with those peculiar nightmares.  Once, one of the nightmares has started to come by day... Suddenly, now, it came again...

Kirk is never really in top form, even from the very first page of the first chapter he is on the back foot.  I can actually understand his fatigue, that's fine, we can surmise he's under mental assault so he's not incredibly sharp, but the thing is Marshak and Culbreath keep him weak throughout the entire novel.  I don't mean just physically weak, but mentally weak too, and in a situation where he has to represent the strength of individuality against opposing 'onenesses' it's a little... off putting.  They stop short at feminising him, which some commentators have suggested Marshak and Culbreath are fond of doing (The Prometheus Design?)  but they do ensure that Spock is always the stronger one even when he's battling against pon farr.  Yes, this novel is set seven years after the events in 'Amok Time' and as such Spock is suffering from the beginnings of pon farr's effects.  Nobody notices of course, because... reasons... but if Jims not careful he's going to have sexy times with his first officer.

What makes you think that Jen?  Well friends, it's not so much homoerotic subtext so much as homoerotic text.  You see in the above passage, the language of possession?  Well it doesn't stop there!  Spock saves Kirk multiple times, when their mental bond is broken he is agitated and worried, instead of allowing Kirk to be taken to sickbay by the medical team he carries him there himself...

And then he uh... deals with his issue with the cat person / woman / freeagent / half zaran with hugely powerful psychic powers who is also in love with Kirk... who is in love with her... who is also in love with Spock.  And you know how triangles are?  You know how it's  love triangle not a love chevron?  Well that part doesn't get left out either to be honest, but it's not gay if there's a woman involved right?  She's essentially camouflage for the Kirk/Spock shipping, that even gets commented on near the end of the novel.

I know I've kind of jumped ahead, but essentially there are two opposing forces Gailbraith's 'Oneness' and the 'Totality', neither are particularly good, but when choosing allies better to side with the devil you do rather than the devil you don't, right?  The cat girl  / free agent is needed by the totality in order to be a super powerful psychic conductor and enable the totality to forcibly absorb the minds of people in entire galaxies.  However, in order to unlock this power she needs to mate and bond with someone.  She ends up wanting both Spock and Kirk but ends up with neither, finally commenting that she wouldn't be able to go with one of them because it would mean monogamy, and it isn't for her sake she's saying that either.

Oh yes, a threesome is definitely implied, in fact I said to my partner, that I thought a whole scene  / chapter was missing, then later I read that someone believed there were extra chapters floating out there amongst certain circles...  I knew I wasn't just making stuff up!!

Triangle is very convoluted and nonsensical.  It's mainly concerned with a hurt/comfort relationship between Kirk and Spock (especially at the end... poor Kirk) and... if that isn't your kink, well... I think it's a bit lacking in any substance what so ever.  I think it could have been a very good idea if they'd developed the story instead of torturing Kirk but hey... what can you do?

2/5 - I'ma just gonna leave this here.

I need to pick a good one next... 

Star Trek - Pawns and Symbols

Jean felt herself lowered suddenly, plunged into the dark.  She was totally disorientated.  The krelk released her into someone's arms.  "Jean!"  The whisper was Aernath's.  She clung to him convulsingly.

... Convulsingly?

It was about half way through Pawns and Symbols that I turned to my long suffering partner and said 'By God, I've found one, I've found a Mary Sue!'.  He laughed then, and we got into a discussion about the origin of the Mary Sue (he didn't realise that the term has its origin in Star Trek fanfiction) and whether this actually was a Mary Sue representation or not.  This soon spiralled into a mini -ongoing - research project, which then sidestepped into why 2009 Uhura is a poor representation of Uhura and a step backwards for female representation in Star Trek - ongoing project no. 2 - and then lept to the defense of slash ST fans everywhere.

And that was only half way through the book.

Pawns and Symbols (#26 Pocket, Giant #4 Titan) (1985)  by Majliss Larson really has to be read to be believed.  There were many times when I realised my mouth was agape, stunned by what I had just read, others where I had to screw up my face to try to release my muscles from a near constant smirk.  I gave a running commentary to my partner, complete with predictions of what I thought would happen next (it wasn't hard), and proclaimed loudly that I had found 'Twilight in Space'.  How about 'Wrath of Mary Sue'?  No? OK.

Firstly, I'm going to get this out the way.  It's definitely a woman writing, and I think the name 'Majliss Larson' is a pseudonym.  I've looked in my usual places and she doesn't appear to have an online presence or any other reference to her aside from Pawns and Symbols.  To be fair, if I was wrote Pawns and Symbols under my own name, I probably would have legally changed it by now, or invoked something like 'right to be forgotten'!

I have to be fair though, it isn't the worst Star Trek novel I've read (and that pool is increasing), but it is the most blatant Mary Sue / Author Proxy / Self Indulging one so far.  About 90% of the book is taken up by misadventures of Jean Czerny - young, botanist, amnesiac, genius, Klingon whisperer, super attractive to Klingons, can beat a Klingon in a knife fight... need I go on?  Her ridiculous romances with out of character Klingons are set within the theme of 'stranger in a strange land'.  Jean has to adapt to life as a captive in hostile territories and in the process exposes the political machinations and mentalities of Klingon society...

...While banging Kang.  Whilst falling in love with the most gentle Klingon ever with blue eyes (later they are described as amethyst as Larson forgets what she wrote earlier in the novel).  You know what?  I'm not even really spoiling it if I tell you that by the end of the novel after smexing Kang one final time, she gets with the pretty Klingon.  Why am I not spoiling it?  Because Jean is a Mary Sue, loud, proud and (probably) unashamed, and if you rouse your inner teenage fangirl she will inform you what the next 'plot twist' will be.

The tag line for the novel is deceptive:

THE KLINGONS ARE HUNGRY FOR WAR - 

AND KIRK IS CAUGHT IN A BRUTAL BATTLE OF WITS!

I actually believed that I was going to get a clever story this time!  A battle of wits!  Perhaps I was going to be treated to Kang and Kirk butting heads, out maneuvering each other with a grudging respect.   The title Pawns and Symbols sounds exciting and the cover, Kirk, Kang and a chess board, complete with 'chess piece' Jean, wheat, and the Enterprise was intriguing.  There is no battle of wits between Kirk & Kang, because Kirk gets barely any story time, the original crew get barely any story time!  There is one section where the Enterprise rescues a Romulan woman, but this feels like filler, almost as if Larson was told 'look here, this in a Star Trek story, you need to actually put the Enterprise Crew in it!'...  And she does but... it's not so much shoehorned in as crowbarred in.  Spock does have a slightly larger role in a strange episode while posing as a Romulan on a Klingon planet...

Essentially, Pawns and Symbols paints a sympathetic picture of the Klingons, and that they are are essentially a good, kind people who war with an aggressive nature.  Also they are seemingly muslims who treat women as chattel and in some areas are forced to wear clothing very similar to the burka.  Women are also written as second class citizens, forced into a subservient attitude - I'm kind of glad that TNG didn't go down this route with female Klingons!

In this story, the Klingons are in a position of desperate need.  They have caused famine on their planets with alteration of their grain strains but do not wish to seek help because they do not want to bargain from a position of weakness.  This is why they keep Jean Czerny as a hostage, as both a bargaining chip and a resource.  Afterall, she is a genius botanist and will be able to help them use a new resistant type of grain succeed on the various affected planets.  Jean is held captive out of necessity for about 6 months, and in that time, makes enemies, becomes Krang's consort, falls in love with Aernath, adopts a Klingon orphan...

Memorable(?) moments:

- Kang cutting her clothes off her the first time they met.
- The 'I'm too scared to write fallacio so this will have to do scene'.
- The it's not rape, it's coerced sex scene.
- 'I'm screwing Kang, but I sure do hope Aernath is jealous' moments.
- Jean seriously scolding herself in the shower and Kang coming to the rescue.
- All the times we didn't have to know Jean needed to go / went to the toilet.
- Mara (Kangs estranged / now not estranged) wife being totally cool and sisterly about Kang screwing Jean.  Surprised she didn't suggest a menage a trois, all the other Klingons love her.
- Jean being made to strip for Kang after being seriously injured.
- All the teeth grindingly terrible variations of 'speaking another language' through sex.
- Injury is this author's kink.
- A bizarrely long episode about Klingon colour blindness that has no actual bearing on the plot, except perhaps making Aernath look more fragile and adorkable.
- Tribbles.

Luckily, this whole debacle is easily written off, as much of its musings about possible Klingon culture and such is smashed a couple of years later with Next Generation in 1987.  As such, Pawns and Symbols has not aged well.  I feel that this book got published 'under the radar' as it were, since we know that Roddenberry (or at least his team) cracked down on the novels after being triggered by Killing Time's homosexual tendencies.  Killing Time was number 24, Pawns and Symbols is number 26, there would have been only a couple of months between them, I doubt whether the editorial mess would have been cleared up in time for this book to have been filtered out or had any editing.  Actually, I'd be surprised if this book had any proofreading or editing at all.  There are so many typing errors and sentences that make absolutely no sense littered throughout, at times I found myself wondering what had just happened.

Frankly I found myself wondering how this book ever saw print.

I've got to give credit where it's due though.  Whoever Majliss Larson is, I think she really cared for this story; I think it meant a lot to her, I think she tried hard.  That doesn't change the fact it's bloody awful, but you do get a sense that it wasn't a throw away novel for her.  In fairness, she tried to show more of the universe by putting a new character in a difficult situation and was able to increase the time passing in the novel as part of that - I haven't had another ST novel in which the event spanned 6 months... yet.  She did try to add a quite a complex society to the Klingons, which could have worked, but her vessel - Jean 'Mary Sue' Czerny - was not the best choice.  Frustratingly, I could see ways in which the narrative could have been improved, she had good ideas that if told more from the perspective of the Enterprise crew could really have worked.

Consequently, I really don't think this is a recommended read unless you're interested in strange OOC Klingon centric stories, and even then you've got to have a high Mary Sue tolerance to reach the end (I was struggling!).

1/5 - Kang bang...?

Star Trek - The Vulcan Academy Murders

'I'm on my way!' Sarek cut him off, clamping control over the panic in his veins.  It had happened twice now - and if it happened a third time, the victim would be Amanda!

Spock is one of the most popular characters in Star Trek, he's also one of the most difficult to write - to 'get right'.   Is he the cold logical machine with the brain of a computer, or is he a loving, passionate empath who hides a tortured soul?  Well, those examples are two extremes and he's a little more complex than that (not that we haven't seen depictions of him at both ends of the emotional spectrum), and that's why we love him.  That's why we love Vulcans generally, they are complex and exotic,  they have strange customs and abilities but are still familiar enough to 'bond' with.  I think of Vulcans as 'space elves' not just because of the pointy ears, but also because they remind me of Tolkien's elves, in the world but not of the world and adhering to logic and concepts which are often totally at odds with what humans would deem 'logical'.  Both Tolkien's elves and Star Trek's Vulcans refuse to do what is necessary because it is against their creed yet allow other species -humans - to do the dirty work.

I think what really draws us to Vulcans and by extension, Spock, is the strange suppression of emotion and especially the denial over that emotion love - yet if you watch Sarek and Amanda (Spock's Vulcan father and Human mother) in the TOS episode 'Journey to Babel' there is is little else you can call their actions (their 'PDA's) except intense love.  Love in 'all it's forms' is central to the Star Trek creed and Vulcans are not immune to writer and fan speculation.

The Vulcan Academy Murders (1984) (#20 Pocket, #12 Titan) by Jean Lorrah had been on my to read list from the beginning; who wouldn't be drawn in by the slightly ridiculous tag line 'Captain Kirk becomes an interplanetary homicide detective!'?!

Jean Lorrah is/was actually a professor of English at Murray State University and had received her PhD from Florida State University. She's also one of the authors behind the Sime-Gen universe (together with Jacqueline Lichtenberg) but it best known for her 'Savage Empire' series. This novel appears to be one of her earlier novels, which would probably explain why it is utterly mad, like box of frogs type mad. Oh and by the way, in this case the cover has virtually nothing to do with what actually happens in the book - I'm not really sure what the artist's brief was, but it wasn't the actual story, that's for sure.

The easiest way to describe this novel is it's Star Trek x Columbo. Like Columbo it's less of a 'whodunit' and more a 'howcatchem'. Although Lorrah doesn't actually tell you who did it out right, she isn't very subtle with her 'subtle hints', so essentially from the beginning the reader is frustrated because there is only one culprit and every single character is struck with 'ISS' (Inexplicable Stupidity Syndrome) and nobody can make a single leap of logic unless it's spelt out to them first.

Essentially the plot revolves around two murders and one attempted murder of people within stasis fields which are supposed to be healing them from assorted terrible maladies. There is a Vulcan woman who is wife to one of the doctors/scientists, Amanda Grayson (Spock's mother), and an Enterprise crewman who was horrifically injured in a Klingon attack. Two of these people are killed while in stasis (no prizes for guessing who survives) and Kirk takes it upon himself to investigate and find the murderer, because Vulcan has no police force and these highly logical intelligent Vulcans can't possibly conceive of the idea of murder on Vulcan. I kid you not. 

As you can probably predict if you've ever watched a Columbo, Murder She Wrote or Poirot episode, there is the red herring character whom everyone believes is the killer until proven wrong and the keen investigator Colum-Kirk falls into a terrible trap threatening his life! Kirk manages to be found in the knick of time by McCoy (possibly the only character with half a brain on Vulcan) and finally they catch the real killer. Amanda wakes up from stasis safely and we have heart warming Vulcan family scenes.

One thing you're sure to agree is that Kirk should stick to his dayjob, he makes a really terrible detective.

The murder plot line is really secondary to Lorrah's Vulcan family drama and her opportunity to put her stamp on Vulcan family values. Some people have praised Lorrah's depictions of the various Vulcan characters and their relationships, saying that she 'really got a handle on her Vulcans' and it has scored quite well on Goodreads, but honestly I think the way she characterises them denigrates their otherness to just slightly more obtuse humans.

Some of the novel is from Sarek's perspective, which is often funny, but he is characterised as a meddling maid who is interested in match making his friends (because Vulcans just want to see everyone married off apparently) and who is exceptionally emotional. One of the things which does come across however is that the Vulcan logic is a facade and not deeply ingrained into them, so... how can I explain this, instead of logic being their instinct it's their suppressant. Essentially Lorrah characterises the Vulcans as feeling the emotions and then consciously suppressing them as opposed to it being instinctual and not a conscious decision. 

This novel also investigates the Vulcan 'bonding' between couples, including the effect on the surviving partner when the other dies and how it is possible to survive the severance of the bond. The parts which deal with the bonding are well done but if they had been allowed to stand alone as points of emotion for the Vulcans they would have been more effective, as it is their poignancy is muted because of the surrounding sea of Vulcan emotion.

One of the more clever aspects of the book attempts to give a backstory to M'Benga the doctor who specialises in Vulcan biology on the Enterprise. This novel suggests that he was studying on Vulcan in order to be able to treat Vulcans off world.

The Vulcan Academy Murders hasn't aged well from a lore perspective. For one thing, it's inaccurate as far as Sarek is concerned, because it doesn't take into account Star Trek V (1989) canon that he has previously been married / bonded and he survived her death, nor that Amanda will die after 36 years of marriage to Sarek (this novel attempts to extend her life). Sarek also will go on to state that he never told Amanda he loved her (TNG: Sarek), which is completely at odds with the overly emotional Sarek (and other Vulcans) we see in this novel. Finally, in The Vulcan Academy Murders Sarek and Spock end up in a mind meld together trying to save Amanda, however, again in TNG (Unification) Picard learns that Spock had never mind melded with his father and thus had never known about the love and pride Sarek had felt for him.

Essentially, Jean Lorrah's The Vulcan Academy Murders doesn't really add anything to our understanding of the Star Trek universe because the characterisation of Kirk, Bones and the Vulcans is so out of character that it would have to be consigned to alternate universe or just crack. It simply makes no sense when applied to the broader Trek universe. That isn't to say it isn't fun to read, just don't expect anything particularly ground breaking or sensible - it might be worth it just to read about Colum-Kirk and matchmaking, mother-hen Sarek.

Humans living up to expectations - 2/5

Edit: Sorry, sorry! My formatting went wrong!  I think it's fixed now!

Star Trek - Fanzine - Stellar Gas

'Stellar Gas' published by 'Pon Farr Press' is a 1979 Star Trek fanzine edited by Della Van Hise.

'Della Van Hise?' I hear you murmur to yourself, a vague recollection sparking neurons in your brain.  'Where have I heard that name before?'.

Oh my friends, your memory does not do you ill, I wrote a review on that wonderful monster!

Killing Time - Della Van Hise

The thing is, Killing Time charms me.  I can be pretty hard to please, but while I do recognise that it has many problems and should be lambasted for its myriad of inconsistencies, inaccuracies and self indulgences, I also love it for the utter slashy pleasure it was to read. 

'Jen', I hear you say, 'why are you writing another love letter to Killing Time right now?  I thought you were reviewing a fanzine 'Stellar Gas' edited by Della Van Hise'.

OK ok... I'll explain myself.  I like buying and collecting things which connections to other things.  So, for example, when I saw an ebay listing for a fanzine edited by Hise, I was suddenly very excited, and it was very moderately priced too (and already in the UK! Hooray!)!  This is actually a Xerox copy of the fanzine, not an original however it was advertised as such and the quality is very good anyway, so I can't complain!

Now, fanzines are actually a relatively new thing for me, they aren't common in the UK and the postage costs from the states can often be prohibitive so I don't have many, although I am falling in love with them.  I just love fanfiction and actually, when you look into the history of fan communities especially the Star Trek communities, they can be pretty fascinating!

TLDR: I bought on impulse because it had Della Van Hise's name on it and because it was at the right price.

The publication itself is pretty good looking, the layout and art is satisfying; you wouldn't believe my relief when I saw that the text for the longer stories was organised into columns and didn't traverse the width of the page.  However, because of the kind of dated art (in some cases, high contrast to enable easy printing) and text, it reminded me of my old church newsletters!  It's a very odd sensation!

Contents wise, there are fifteen pieces of artwork of varying quality, some are reportedly produced by professional artists, I haven't actually looked into this yet however.

Artists Featured:

• Ralph Fowler
• Cheryl Newsome
• Scott Gilbert
• Kerry Gammill
• Matt Fertig
• Craig Sattler
• Bev Zuk
• Martin Cannon
• Jim Kuzee

There are ten pieces of written work, two of which are prose, while the remainder are poetry.

Writers Featured:

• Tracey Alexander
• Pamela Rose
• Leslie Fish
• Jeanne Powers
• Marilynn Lebo
• Christopher Randolf & James Van Hise
• Della Van Hise
• Merlin Adams
• D J Biehl

The first prose piece is written by Tracey Alexander and is titled 'Lost in Thought'.  Whilst I was reading it I got this terrible sense of deja vu.  There's time travel, a certain female Romulan commander, slash overtones in neon lights, a plot to change history enough for the Romulans to take control, a strange reconciliation with that Romulan commander...

It was too close to the plot of Killing Time.  The writing, too similar, too... familiar.  My partner suggested this Tracey girl was probably a friend of Van Hise, they possibly discussed it with each other.  A quick google search confirmed it.  Tracey Alexander is a pseudonym used by Della Van Hise - one of the many pseudonyms used by Della Van Hise.  Lost in Thought then is an early draft of Killing Time.  I can only imagine Van Hise or Alexander got good feedback for Lost in Thought to make her want to continue to work on the idea.  I have to admit that Lost in Thought is a pretty interesting story with plenty, PLENTY of Kirk and Spock agonising over each other, their relationship, their feelings...  I'm not going to complain, it gave me a case of the warm fuzzies.

Lost in Thought does differ from Killing Time, obviously a lot of content is added, some taken away.  For example, Lost in Thought has a Starfleet sponsored conspiracy, actions on the Enterprise which are tantamount to mutiny, Kirk's mind being removed from his body and placed in another person, then into Spock (all of which has some analogue in the series), and plenty of slashy moments.  It doesn't have the 'second history' story line, nor the beautifully self indulgent characterisation of Kirk as a drug addict ensign, vulnerable to and sensitive to the dutiful ministrations of his Vulcan captain... ... ... Sorry I slipped off into lala land for a second there.

The Kirk / Spock relationship is understandably less physical in Lost in Thought, but simultaneously more intimate due to Kirk literally being on Spock's mind!  The weirdest scene is Kirk taking over Spock's body in order to have sex with the Romulan commander while Spock hid in his own mind.  There's also an indication that Kirk and Spock are already bonded at this point, Spock seems to indicate this, even if Kirk doesn't know.  It certainly isn't a physical relationship at this point, but the general gist by the end is that Kirk and Spock are going to discuss their relationship further. 

Basically, if you liked Killing Time and you like slashy, romancy, dramancy (what?!) stories that are unapologetic and shameless in their distribution of the warm and fuzzies, this story is probably for you.

The second prose piece is 'The Gift' by Christopher Randolf & James Van Hise.  James Van Hise is Della Van Hise's husband and... oh, you guessed it, Christopher Randolf is another pseudonym for Della Van Hise.  I'm not even sure how much James Van Hise put into this story because it has Della all over it, from the overt slash to her stylistic quirks.

The Gift is less enjoyable, mainly because it is utterly batshit crazy.  And yes, I mean more crazy than Killing Time and Lost in Thought combined, let me summarise.

Kirk is stranded on a very wet planet, he can't get back to the enterprise because electrical interference or some such thing.  Kirk gets approached by an elf, who uses a magical knife on him which results in immortality.  Kirk gets back to the Enterprise and finds Spock dying, he uses the magical knife on Spock.  Kirk and Spock are now immortal.  Kirk and Spock get blown up, but survive as pretty much mounds of flesh, because, they are magically immortal.  McCoy takes them back to the same planet as Pike and the Keepers in order that they stay sane.  McCoy ends up going there too, because, he shouldn't have to pay the penalty for bringing them back to the planet.

I don't really have much more to say about The Gift, old, little space elves, space magic, immortality, ridiculous contrivances, also, permanent universe alteration, there is no reset button.  I guess that's the joy of fanfiction as opposed to the novelisations, there can be permanent changes to the status quo.  On the other hand, I'm not sure stories like this are not just a waste of paper.  Sorry if I sound a bit harsh there, but I really do feel that way!  Just think, they could have brought down the price of the production of their fanzine considerably if they hadn't put that piece in!

The poetry is pretty fun, there is a poem by Della Van Hise (under her real name!) here too.  I don't think that the other poetry is by her under pseudonyms, but there's always a possibility!    Although I did like Hise's  Feast of Dust, I preferred the poems by Merlin Adams and Leslie Fish, both of which are written from the perspective of Doctor McCoy.  Adams' poem takes the form of McCoy observing Spock whilst Kirk is on an away mission without him, while Leslie Fish's offering takes an unusual format (rather like a translated poem from ancient Greece), as McCoy considers his relationship with his old enemy: death.  I'm actually a really big poetry nerd, so I'm always interested in reading it.

The final parts of this publication are a ~very useful~ listing of fanzines published under 'Pon Farr Press' and an open letter to the fandom about an unscrupulous seller of unauthorised xeroxed zines at conventions in the states.  I love this kind of thing, because it gives you a snap shot of what was troubling the fans at the time, looks like some things always remain the same!

I realise that it might be a bit strange to review a fanzine which is pretty hard to get, but seeing as this has been out of print for so long, I might scan and upload parts of it, like the art work, some poems and perhaps the first story so that other people can actually read it.  I'll put it on a new page on the blog when I get it done, so keep an eye out.  I do have my eye on getting Stellar Gas 2, mainly for the front cover - Spock on an alicorn, THAT is a picture I must have in my collection!

ps. Sorry if you saw this post before I fixed some errant sentences, I'd edited some of it from my mobile and managed to move entire sentences around accidently!

pps. I am never editing on a mobile device ever again, every correction causes more errors!

Star Trek - Costume Parts - Postal Jackpot!

Firstly, sorry this isn't another review, but today was a postal jack pot day!

Well, ok ANOTHER postal jackpot day!  Since I had a shipment of sixty books from America last week - I bought a job lot of sixty books just for the chance that I would get one rare book out of them, and I won the gamble!  Oh yes!

Anyway, today's postal jackpot was, firstly a package from xscapesprops which contained a Star Trek Women's Uniform pattern, an Enterprise insignia patch, and lengths of captain's braid!  I only ordered it 9 days ago, so I was super surprised and super pleased that it came so fast!

Honestly, so pleased!  The shipping was really reasonable too!  There were other sellers trying to charge me the cost of the braid again to ship it to the UK, but I got these items for a very humble shipping fee.  Hooray!

What is the good of these items if I don't have any fabric?  Well I do!  Imported from Germany I have some imitation velour fabric in.... Command Gold! 

Well it certainly acts like the velour in the series, it looks completely different in different light, but it doesn't turn into a completely different colour like the command tunics in the original series.  Did you know that Kirk's gold tunic is actually green in real life but the combination of the studio lights and the camera mean that that fabric shows as gold?  Its the same colour as his green tunic!  My mind was actually blown when I found that out!  Later on they actually make it canon that the tunics are gold.  That being said, if you have the first edition technical manual (like I do) you'll notice that the colour they list in there is a completely different colour again.  There is one page in the technical manual which is colour printed and all the pages with coloured designs refer back to that page.  The command yellow or '13 - Tenne' which is indicated for the command tunics is printed as a very strange colour, very dark and orange.  I was going to use the technical manual for colour guidance, but the colours listed are quite 'off' at times.  There's probably been updates since the 1975 manual but... where's the fun in making it easy for myself!

I took a picture of the colour swatch and then tried to match the colour on the screen to the colour in the book, by my eyes and my monitor settings, this is the colour that is listed for the colour of command tunics.  It is quite dark and quite orange.  More the upper left of the swatch than the right.

I also got a pair of boots through the post today 'vintage' they claimed, but I'm not so sure.  Either way they are very nice quality, however, they are too long for the costume... the technical manual lists 34.3cm as the length for both men's and women's boots.  Unfortunately these come up to the knee, I was going to adjust them but they are really far too nice to cut!  So I need to find another pair.  If push comes to shove though, I will use them for the convention this month.

I need only a couple of parts for the costume now really (aside from my own labour).  A pair of tights/leggings and a beautiful blonde wig!

If it wasn't obvious enough, I'm going to be in costume as a female Captain Kirk!  I hope to be meeting up with a female Spock too!  Unfortunately I haven't been able to convince a friend to be female McCoy - it could be quite a combination!

I also thought I'd kinda be in character:

'So... I heard that men are from Mars and women are from Venus... but I think that you, you must be from Orion...'

HA.  Think that's a good enough pick up line?  ((It's terrible I know)).

Star Trek - The Three Minute Universe

'"We had better prepare ourselves, Jim.  There's a very real possibility that he may be dead."  Kirk lifted his head.  "From what we know of the Sackers," he said heavily, 'maybe we'd better pray that he is."'

The Three-Minute Universe (1988) (#13 Titan, #41 Pocket) is by Barbara Paul, a mystery and science fiction writer active between 1978 and 1997; this is Paul's only Star Trek novel.

I have to admit, I don't really know where to start with The Three-Minute Universe, and I've been kind of... putting off this review.  I can't say that the writing is bad - it isn't.  I can't say the story is unoriginal - there are clearly worse offenders.  I also can't say it's particularly appealing.  It took me three attempts and a break of 3 weeks to actually finish reading it and, considering I generally read books of this size in one or two sittings, it wasn't a great start.  I think the most annoying thing about this novel is that it had a lot of potential, the idea is good, the writing is good, it just trips at the last hurdle and falls apart.

The premise is that an sensorially abhorrent race known as the Sackers have stolen a device capable of ripping the fabric of space and tapping into the energy of another, forming universe to draw off potentially near infinite energy.  They wipe out the home system of an entire race in the process of activating the device, but chaos doesn't stop there; the new universe is expanding through the tear, causing a wave of blistering heat to surge onwards, engulfing all in its path, threatening to destroy our own.

So we have some really interesting ideas here.  Paul introduces a completely disgusting looking race we haven't met before, I mean, they are so revolting that it causes seemingly every other Federation species to become violently ill, so offensive is the Sacker presence to the senses.  However, until now the Sackers have been passive, peaceful.  They simply trade with the Federation and then leave again; they are even mindful of their appearance and adapt how they dress and present themselves in order to illicit less of a response from other species.  This is how Kirk responds to seeing a sacker on his vidscreen:

'All his training and natural tolerance seemed to have deserted him.  Meeting alien races had been an integral part of his adult life; he would feel as if he'd lost a part of himself if it were to come to an end (...) But this race... just a two dimensional image of its only technically humanoid members was enough to make him feel queasy'.

We then get our first description of a Sacker, in which we are told they are large blobs in a state of 'self-regenerating decay', their mobile, white slug-like organs are visible and small maggot like things seem to move between the organs.  Kirk feels bile in his mouth just looking at them, they are by all counts revolting.  Somewhat understandably, how they look and smell has coloured interactions with species within the federation, making them a 'lepur' race, pariahs.  I think this might actually be one of the problems with how I feel about the book, the aliens are SO alien (as kirk said, only technically humanoid) they are hard to relate to.  This is actually one of the major plot points, but it's quite hard to really blame the Federation races for reacting the way they do against the Sackers; after all when they are so disgusting your eyes water, you vomit AND if there are a few of them you pass out, it's hard to imagine not wanting to avoid them at all costs.  As it turns out, the reason for the Sacker actions is how they are treated by everyone else; the reasoning is essentially that since they can't be accepted, they will either destroy or dominate every other species.

They seem pretty irredeemable right?  Well, the way that Paul gets around the completely alien and 'evil' nature of this race, is that when Kirk, Scotty, Uhura and Chekov end up captured by the Sackers, she makes them... children, adolescents.  The adults on this ship (the one that was stolen at the beginning of the book) have all died and the child Sackers are trying to continue their mission against the rest of the galaxy.  The reason they capture the Enterprise officers?  In order to have the likes of Kirk, Scotty, Uhura and Chekov teach them how to pilot their ship.

The child Sackers end up being rather endearing all told.  They are children pretending to be adults and making bad decisions because that's what the adults told them to do.  The latter half of the book is somewhat painful, or should I say uncomfortable, to read as the Enterprise crew use the innocence of the children against them.  Sure, they are mass murdering monsters, but they are also sincere and look up to their mentors.  Kirk, Scotty, Uhura and Chekov even name them, inadvertently initially; it's really hard to really dislike creatures named things like 'Iris', 'Blue', 'Babe', 'Bonesovna' and... 'Orangejuiceandwodka'.  I suppose I must just... feel uncomfortable with the fact that the Enterprise officers are being giant jerks... to children.

In the end I felt really, very sorry for these kids, I mean, they really did try hard to do what they were told, and the commentary from Spock and Sulu on the Enterprise wondering what exactly they were doing by rolling the ship over and doing all these odd maneuvers made me feel highly embarrassed.

When Kirk and the others finally make their move to take the ship, it does turn out they have become quite fond of the children, and are genuinely saddened when there is a death.  The high point, however, is the mental image of the five crew members all in a very small box playing a form of extreme twister as they take cover from a raging fire on the Sacker ship.  I read this part out to my partner, and just about made it through the section without crying with laughter.  It might be worth reading the book just for this scene.

Paul introduces the Bubble Universe Theory as the 'science' behind the Zirgosian device.  It's a multiverse theory and in this case it posits that our universe is a bubble in a sea of bubbles, pressed up against one another in a state of eternal inflation.  The title The Three-Minute Universe refers to the age of the adjacent bubble universe when it is initially tapped into by the device.  Essentially, if the tear between universes isn't repaired, then the younger universe would expand into the prime universe, destroying everything in an advancing wave of fire.

Fire and fear of fire is a pretty big theme in The Three-Minute Universe. Paul decides to develop Uhura's character by giving her a tragic back story.  Uhura is deathly afraid of fire, due to an event which occurred in her dorm when she was a child.  Her friend and roommate T'iana gets trapped under a fallen beam and dies in the blaze, Uhura is unable to help her before she succumbs to the heat and fire.  Uhura still dreams about the blaze, and the fear comes back most vividly during the events of this book.  She faces the fear both abstractly and physically, and in the end conquers her fear.

Spock also gets some development in The Three-Minute Universe, although this comes belatedly, literally the last few pages of the novel.  Spock feels fear at the impossible odds facing them, and after the Enterprise's victory, retreats from the bridge, closely followed by Kirk.  On being questioned by Kirk, Spock reveals that he has felt fear for the first time.  In response, Kirk gives him a pep talk which concludes on this note:

"Yes! Don't deny your fear.  Use it.  You'll see, it will add  whole new dimension to your life - you'll start seeing things in a way you've never seen them before.  Anyone with human genes in him who's never known fear - well, he's not.. whole.  Oh, Spock, don't you see?  You've found a part of yourself that was missing.  Don't despair, Spock!  Rejoice!  Rejoice."
    For a long moment there was no response.  Then the Vulcan slowly lifted his head, looked his friend straight in the eye... and rejoiced."

Ok, I admit it, this in actually a pretty ADORABLE moment, but I'd kind of expect it in a novel which had been more slashy, or even just one which had actually been more Spock-centric.  This ending scene just seems to have been thrown in out of nowhere, why are we suddenly focusing on Spock's first (really?) experience of fear and not having a final resolution with Uhura?  I don't know if I can really accuse Paul of being trite here, because we're still relatively early (well, below #50 Pocket) but... Spock having a break down to add extra emotional weight, implying this is the fist time he has felt fear, I just don't buy it, you'd have to put this whole episode incredibly early in the initial 5 year mission to make that statement.

I've only really talked about the latter half of the book, but really, the first half if a bit redundant and only sets the scene for the capture of the Enterprise officers.  Put it this way, once I got past the first half, I read the book pretty quickly.

So, what's my opinion?  It's... okay.  It's nothing to really write home about, but it isn't bad per se.  There is quite a lot of humour with the Sackers, and you do get the odd moment which is written really well, but on the whole if you're not worried about reading every Star Trek TOS novel, then you can probably, safely give this one a miss.  If you are a big fan of Uhura however and her character development, this is probably of interest for you, but otherwise it's not really worth it.

2/5 - DO NOT HUG THE SACKERS.

Star Trek - Killing Time

"Let us understand one another, ensign Kirk," Spock Began...

Before we begin proper, I want you to understand a couple of things.  I love this book.  I love it for its utter absurdity.  I love it for its blatant slash pairing.  I love its clunky dialogue, it's overly romantic descriptions and it's not so subtle expectation for you to read between the lines; ok, not so much 'read between the lines' as read the neon lights.

I also love the controversy of how this book came to be printed, how many of the original printings were recalled destroyed, or how furious Gene is said to have been when he realised that all the edits which had been made (over 50 in total) had been completely ignored and thus, this beautifully slashy monster had found its way to the shelves. Read more here.

Killing Time by Della Van Hise is that wonderful monster and I can tell you here at the beginning it is getting two ratings: 1/5 and 5/5.  The story is a nonsensical romp, the writing at times, ridiculous (you'd be forgiven if you had to check the cover to make sure you weren't reading Mills & Boon), and the slash so thinly veiled that it would make your grandmother blush.  However, despite it's seeming lack of quality, I just can't hate it.  In fact, this sincere, unabashed labour of love wins me over totally.

I'll be the first to admit I'm picky when it comes to books, but occasionally a spectacularly bad book can win me over, and Killing Time is one of those books.  You know the phrase 'it's so bad it's good'?  I have been known to describe Killing Time as 'pure gold', 'genius', 'utterly hilarious', perhaps I'm just Hise's intended audience?  Unfortunately, I don't have a first edition copy (mine is the first revised edition...), but I'm working on it! List of changes between the two editions.

So... give me a brief overview?

You've got it!  The novel is initially pretty slow to start in comparison to many of the other TOS novels from the period, which is actually pretty nice.  We're introduced to a couple of new characters, Richardson (a human) and S'Parva (a telepathic dog like race 'body of a goddess, face of an irish setter').  These two new characters are well developed and are more important than characters like Sulu or Uhura who fall to the wayside somewhat.  We also learn that Enterprise crew are having strange dreams in which they feel slightly displaced.  These dreams turn out to be 'second history' asserting itself, until finally, 'first history' finally gives way and is replaced by 'second history', with disastrous consequences.

It's the mirror universe then?

No, it isn't the mirror universe, it's the 'second history' of the prime universe.  It would be interesting to find out how the mirror universe would be affected by 'second history' though... I digress.

It turns out that the Vulcans are the dominant species in the Federation, the Enterprise is now the Shikahr and Spock is the captain!  Kirk on the other hand has been relegated to the position of ensign!

The alteration of the timeline hasn't gone smoothly however, and the disparity between first and second history is causing those whose second history life is too disparate from their original life to go mad!  Those who fulfil the same role in both histories do not appear to develop the madness, or at least at the same rate.  McCoy and Uhura fulfil the same roles, and are not plagued by dreams.

Ok, so who are the big bads, and how did they do it?

The Romulans, it was the Romulans.  They sent (*android*) agents back in time and killed the men  who would lay the foundations for the Federation as it stands in first history.  The ships involved in this operation are unchanged by the displacement and those on board retain their full memory of first history.  They did it by travelling at warp ten and slingshotting around the sun, causing them to be able to move backwards (and it seems, forward) in time.

Of course it was the Romulans.

ANYWAY.  Kirk and Spock need to confess their undying love remember their friendship and save the galaxy from madness and destruction, they do this by teaming up with 'Romeo' Richardson and the psychic dog woman.  McCoy is also essential, because he has to um... give medical advice and uh... give support to Captain Spock who is suffering from Pon Farr... (the time line is different, so Spock is going through Pon Farr at a different time... for MAXIMUM drama and sexual tension).

Anything else I should know?

The Romulan Praetor is female and has the hots for Spock.  She actually temporarily bonds with him and uh... solves his pon farr problem.  Additionally, the Romulans appear to be a patriarchy, nobody knows the Praetor is female and she has kinky male slaves?

Honestly, I don't want to spoil TOO much, it's better to read this beauteous piece of slash fanfiction yourself.

Spock as captain of the Shikahr appears to command well, quite unlike in the series, although his own introspection reveals he is not confident of his abilities (despite logically, being perfectly capable).  He feels that he would do better in a supporting role to someone else... someone like Kirk who, in a twist of fate is a conscripted ensign on the ShiKahr.  Kirk is a troubled drug addict who, it seems, was framed for the murder of a Vulcan instructor at the academy.  He was interrogated using the now banned Talos device (coincidentally... Spock tried it on himself and was so horrified by it that he lobbied for it to be banned), which has left him mentally vulnerable and he was later imprisoned in terrible conditions on earth.

Spock and Kirk dream of each other constantly.  They have a permanent mental link, which isn't even severed when second history asserts itself.  Before second history Spock meets his Kirk, he dreams of him and calls him T'lema - he who walks in dreams as well as wondering whether this unknown human was in fact his T'hy'la - friend, brother, lover.  The images he sees in his mind's eye are quite romantic -

'firm features, tanned flesh, expressive hazel eyes, and a compelling human grin.  Single lock of gold-bronze hair falling to the middle of a high forehead.  Still... a stranger.  A man who inhabited dreams'.

Later -

'There was no mistaking the intense hazel eyes, the almost defiant stance, the muscled body, the lock of errant hair which fell into the middle of the human's forehead'.

Spock, surprisingly is the main instigator of their relationship, and it seems the most emotionally affected.  Second history Kirk and his experience of the Talos Device have left him unable to trust his own mind, which essentially strips away a defining portion of Kirk's character.  Kirk discounts his dreams and visions as lingering effects of the mind probing device and chides himself for giving in to delusions of grandeur.  I'm going to come back to 'romantic' but this time I'm going to use a capital 'R'.  The premise of the book is ultimately a 'Romantic' one; the natural order and pure feeling of the universe will assert itself.  In any universe, Kirk must be on the Enterprise, Spock must be partnered with Kirk; they are the linchpins of the galaxy's natural law.  Kirk is a dissociated, Byronic hero, dark, mysterious and brooding (initially, he becomes a Romantic hero later), while Spock is his Romantic counterpart.

Perhaps I'm giving this too much thought.

The most, I don't know, shocking event in this entire travesty is the rape mind meld scene where Spock simply can't help himself and penetrates invades the mind of the sleeping (he was asking for it) Kirk.  This pretty much completely goes against Vulcan ethics on mind melds, since it should only be carried out between willing participants, or at least, they should be awake.  However here Kirk is watched while he sleeps, and then mentally invaded by Spock.  It's not consensual although femme Kirk appears to accept the assault as acceptable after all, he is mad.  After this event, Kirk starts to regain himself and starts to become the Captain we know, with the occasional aggressive outburst.  Without spoiling too much Kirk and Spock retain a strong psychic link even with a couple of solar systems between them... and towards the end of the book we get some very slashy moments... and this is even in the revised edition...  So much Spirk.

The Romulans are quite strangely presented, I won't go into it too much, but they are presented as being a patriarchy while in canon they are pretty egalitarian.  While Van Hise obviously likes the slash pairing of Spirk, she also enjoys the idea of female empowerment and fooling the male Romulans - which is one of the reasons the Praetor is so interested in Spock.  I can't help but think that she has put herself in the position of the Romulan Praetor, and writing some serious wish fulfillment.

Richardson and S'Parva... Furry representation.  You've got to love it.  They are there to help explain the two histories as S'Parva is able to guide Richardson in his dreams about first history.  There is also a very awkward 'don't go to the light' type scene.

I could go on.  But I think I'll end it here.  The revised editions are easy to get hold of, and I sincerely recommend this utter tripe fantastic addition to the Star Trek novel series, whether you are into slash or not.

If you are a fan of slash, boys love, gay fiction, you need to read this.  Kirk and Spock are the first really mainstream slash couple, slash's original meaning was KirkxSpock this is part of gay fiction history.

If you're not a fan, read it and give thanks that after this volume, they kept a closer eye on the non-canon novels.

Highly Recommended - if nothing else it's a good laugh, at best it's an accidental work of genius.

1/5 & 5/5.